Monday, November 20, 2006

The Two-Way Street of Flirting and Attraction

Why do so many guys have a hard time with approaching women and flirting?

Besides the causally-rooted social influence itself, it's because women forgot how to play the flirting game.

When a woman is showing no signs of interest and is being dismissive and aloof like millions of them are today, they're not giving their own dating lives any help.

They'll go to a Starbucks and instead of giving off signs to guys they're interested in, will stay stuck in their iPOD or their laptop essentially expecting guys to do all of the work. Meanwhile they ask 'why can't I meet any men?' Yet there are dozens of great options everytime they go there.

It's right in front of them and they can't even see it. It's time that women started helping men out because the natural way of attraction is called flirting. It's a sexual communication between a man and a woman.

Basically how it works is this; the man walks in and shouldn't have to do anything. From there, women will start picking up his characteristics and if they're interested they will send nonverbal signals back that are subtle yet obvious enough to let the guy know that it's ok to approach.

Millions of women have turned off their receptor cells and ability to play the flirting game. Unfortunately they have become like brick walls.

The man is nonverbally sending out his S.O.N.A.R.R. (science of natural attraction/response) or 'signal' but it's often never getting bounced back by these independent and developed women. Thus everything becomes a challenge.

This is a root of why there are now more singles than ever.

How can I dare say such a thing? Call it cultural differentiation.

In a first world country, everyone is too independent and not interdependent enough.

They're too stuck in their own world. Women will wear iPOD's and not show ANY signs of interest even in guys that they know they are interested in. This further makes them more frustrated.

Because this is such a social pandemic now, few of these people can explain their behavior.

Cultural differentiation from all of this was the one thing that saved me from utter confusion. Here is just an amazingly true concept. As a man you're supposed to be the same man before, during and after any interaction with women and staying high in character.

Now; as a man, you can go in all kinds of different environments and you'll receive all kinds of different responses to absolutely no responses.

Today's women are often so disconnected and cold that a Tom Cruise could walk in and they wouldn't even know it was him if they didn't know before. They've forgotten how to play the game because of all of their independent development.

So if you walk into some environments like I have without doing anything, you're treated as a rock star, other environments will women be actually throwing obvious nonverbal signs back at you to let you know it's ok to approach and then other environments you could be the best looking, highest character guy in the world and the independent, women won't give you more than a glance.

I mean is it YOU? You're (ideally) staying the same high character man at all of those times. That's why you don't EVER depend on any environment to dictate who you are.

You have to know who you are and know your relationship to anything or any event that could happen. You'll know that it's not going to change who you are and you can't depend on the completely variable responses of women or environments.

Can you see why millions of men are frustrated (like I was)? And those are with the aloof and dismissive Prada 'Inner Alpha' women. The Social Alpha women are more apt to pricktease instead of flirt which confuses men even more and doesn't help the women either.

Prickteasing is the socially contrived act of sexual communication. Flirting is the natural act of
communication.

So many men are confused more with women who will pricktease a man into thinking she is flirting with him when she was either just toying around or planning on ditching him anyways.

It comes down to this; flirting is the natural act of sexual communication and it's a two way street.

It's not up to the man alone to do all of the work and entertain a woman. It's also not entirely his fault to take ALL of the burden for the behaviorism that current society has conditioned into the women.

It's up to him to understand the difference between flirting and prickteasing. It's up to him to clear away the confusion so that he can liberate his own lifetime of oppression when it comes to dating.


Rion Williams is one of the foremost experts in dating advice, personal power and relational dynamics. He is well-known within the seduction community itself.

His work focuses on the regaining and improving of real character within frustrated men who do don't want to 'act', use pick-up lines or techniques to get women.

He teaches modern men how to truly be natural and comfortable in their own skin to consistently succeed with women, attraction and dating. You can sign up for his free eZines and find out more information at http://www.relationaldynamics.org

He also has a free podcast at http://www.lifestyledatingradio.com

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