Why Does Dating Have to Be So Difficult Sometimes?

What a confusing world of dating out there isn't it? Now there are now more singles than at any time in
American history.

Why does dating have to be so difficult? Doesn't it seem as if many men are questioning their own manhood? I

mean really...shouldn't it be a natural thing to know how to 'date women'? Why do we have great catches who are both men and women yet are struggling with their own dating and sex lives?

Yes, women are having struggles with it as well. Yet should all of this blame go onto the men? I would like to take you in for a closer look into this great social dynamic paradox.

When you think about it, isn't dating and relationships one of the most important areas of life anyways?

Instead of looking at superficial solutions like most other dating coaches will do ('work harder, join more dating sites, get out there, etc.') I want to go to the root of the issue itself. From there, all of the
action-oriented solutions will present themselves anyways.

Though I write books on this, I'll try and keep this article short.

It is our uniquely modern social dynamic itself that has affected and altered the dating and mating game.

We now live in a social culture that has essentially become more socialistic than Socialistic societies. The level of influence and effect that now exists from our socio-centric culture is unparalleled.

To clarify things, I simply call it the 'social matrix'. I originally called it the 'forced reality'. It is
the socio-cultural reality and power game that has been built on top of nature itself.

You can't deny that any number of people can exist in together because that's what makes a society.

You can look to tribal groups, villages, the caste system, townships, subcultures, prison culture, high school social dynamics, etc. but when you compare any of them to the dominant social system in the world today (Western social culture), they don't compare.

It is no longer an equal society. Architects have essentially taken over and forged the social matrix to be a perfect system of power and influence. Architects such as producers and executives have got millions of people in a chokehold without their ever knowing it.

The whole system is invisible yet incredibly pervasive. You could live your whole life in this social matrix without ever knowing it. Cultural differentiation was the one thing that saved me.

Now am I starting to sound too escapist and like a threat to this culture itself? Well, maybe you had better think about where the threat really lies?

Millions of people are stuck in a stimulus-response relationship DAILY under the power and influence of the Architects. Television, advertising, music, radio, print advertising, etc. All of this is a system which people have become accustomed to.

That are being fed 'programming' from sources outside of a purely open and interdependent relationship. It is no longer a familial society of equal and opportunistic relationships. It is a society of those in power and those who have been programmed and influenced by those in power.

The reason this affects dating is because the Architects of the social matrix have for decades been promoting and exploiting the sexuality of women. They've essentially taken them and given them 'the power'. They promote the sexploitation of women to be the stimulus or 'control' for countless millions of men to 'respond' to.

Just look at the cover of magazines or almost any ad catered to men and see how they somehow attribute a woman's sexuality to get men to 'respond'. This also gets other women to be like these women so they can rise up this superficially created (yet seemingly real) social hierarchy.

This creates trillions of dollars in revenue across multiple industries. But what it is doing when it comes to dating is this; there is now a divergence. By creating this forced reality which is the opposite of nature, there is a great dichotomy.

It is a fantasy.

They promote the fantasy. Pornography is a fantasy where women are teasingly acting unnatural to get men to 'respond'. Now we have 40 year old virgins because of this divergent dating 'reality'.

Real men who are great catches have questioned their own manhood but it was really this great social game that was being played.

Millions of women are living the dichotomy because of adapting to their social environment which tells them to be the stimulus to attract men yet the men keep buying into the fantasy. It's a fantasy for them too. It's leaving millions of people in a dating mess.

People are more independent and isolated now because they are connected to their iPOD's and downloads in a response relationship to that stimulus instead of being in a more open and truly interdependent, familial society like old Europe or small-town American (even Cheers).

The best way you can get on top of this whole dating thing is to not listen to mainstream teachers because they're teaching what doesn't work except for those ready for marriage.

What to do instead, is to seek out the true answers behind the ironic behavior of men and women today.

Therein lies your revelation and ability to actually BE yourself and finally effective around women and dating instead of consistently running into walls.


Rion Williams is one of the foremost experts in dating advice, personal power and relational dynamics. He is well-known within the seduction community itself.

His work focuses on the regaining and improving of real character within frustrated men who do don't want to 'act', use pick-up lines or techniques to get women.

He teaches modern men how to truly be natural and comfortable in their own skin to consistently succeed with women, attraction and dating. You can sign up for his free eZines and find out more information at http://www.relationaldynamics.org

He also has a free podcast at http://www.lifestyledatingradio.com